Maybe……
We've been bombarded with news of the sexual assault of Dec 2012, portrayed as a national tragedy in India and its hard to ignore it and hard to not let it affect my cynical "so what's new?" attitude....Simply put, its an issue that long swept under the carpet has become too big to be covered up anymore..an issue whose "time has come" so to say...But has it really? I am seeking answers...trying to piece together our cultural psyche to find solutions...An attempt to apply logic in an emotional situation - its not fool-proof, but its a thought process that has long way to go...
Is sexual transgression even to the extent exhibited in this
case, so unheard of in India, that the capital city had to buckle down under
protests and the government had to intervene before it ballooned into something
bigger?
The obvious answer is no. Being violated physically is a part of life that
we “manage” – groping, lewd comments, lustful staring, a complete disregard
for the person within the body and the fear at the back of our mind that makes
us palpitate and walk faster in a dark street or a late hour or at the
sight of males. I call this not a problem of women; it’s a problem of people –
including fathers, husbands and brothers as they watch out for loved ones and their safety. Do we complain? No, its so ingrained and the fear of violation is a way of life – this dormant fear that we dress
up in caution – dress sensibly, don’t hang out late, don’t go alone, be wary of
your male friends, and another million precautions every time we step out. Yet children,
girls, women are continually molested, raped or violated in some form every
single day.
So why such a big furor about this one case? Because all that
we had learned to accept and bear with were mild violations. We deluded ourselves that
a complete violation of womanhood cannot happen to me because I am cautious and
sensible. But this case, woke up that dormant fear in us, screaming out loud
that none of my precautions are preventive. It picked the “this could be me”
nerve of the middle class…Middle class not classified by an economic strata but
by the mentality of “if I stay away from trouble, trouble will not find me….all
the injustices are served to those below me and all those above me have the complete
right to trespass every law in the country, I just hide in the shadows”…yet it
was these people that were driven out of the shadows in the last few weeks. I
may sound absolutely demonic stating this, but we needed the callousness,
brutality and shock-level of this case, to make us step out….To be ready to be
tear gassed and lathi charged, to finally take initiative and actually do
something. Someone had to be sacrificed in the altar of an apathetic nation to
remind us about our responsibilities and destiny chose this unassuming woman,
may she rest in peace.
So it happened, people protested, the media added fuel, and of
course social networking set it ablaze,and lastly, lethargically
the unconvincing politicians jumped into the fray. But which of us is
responsible for taking this to a conclusion? More importantly what is a
conclusion?
Castration, death penalty, handover to public – wilder and violent punishment fantasies abound…but
do we believe animal brains can comprehend consequences of actions? Scientifically speaking, acts like in this case are driven by the limbic region of the brain - a portion of our animal instincts that we retained when we evolved out of our ancestors in the jungle. The need to hunt, anything that threatens my territory and survival at the cost of losing our own life is a part of our brains. Even if well camouflaged within societal settings, in a brain that has not had the opportunity to develop and nurture its more "human" regions, it takes little to unleash that animal within... as in this case, or in the case of shooting in Connecticut and hundreds of thousands of cases in history...
This is not to say laws are not important. A strict law, quick and understanding legal action are paramount to deal with exceptions. But, laws cannot deal with norms. Cultural norms that dictate that woman is asking for rape by being out late or dressing in a clothing of choice or that violating a person physically is the ultimate conquest and revenge of an unyielding persona. Now these norms, sowed into the young in various forms and formats need to be weeded out and the communication between the animal self and the emotional human self needs to be strengthened with a proper understanding of sexuality, self esteem and gender awareness. There is a humongous mismatch between the surging animal self that comes to fore in the teens (as aggression in males and unknown fears in females) and the caging imposed by the society (and therefore the human self) that may balance out or tip into a wrong equilibrium based on environment.How much we do to help our adolescents in our sexually repressed society to achieve that balance is appallingly pathetic.
While laws can be the light at the end of the tunnel, addressing a fundamental attitude change can be the sunrise, even if the horizon is distant......
