In a society like India and I assume in many collectivist societies in the East, individualism is looked down upon - you dont have to be "seriously" different, like being gay or physically disabled ( with no contempt whatsoever- I think they're normal people) - all I need is one step over what "society" deems right - it could be, a girl having short hair cut, choosing commerce as a career in 10th std, wearing a bath suit in the swimming pool, wanting to be a cricketer/artist when IT is "hot", choosing to be single, choosing to not have kids, choosing a life partner - decisions small to big....are constrained by "everyone's" happiness - it always prevents you from taking so-called "selfish"decisions or take you on painful guilt trips - for not having catered to other's wishes, or ungratefulness. Honestly, I used to buy it a few years ago....Taking decision to keep people happy...but hey
WTF? really What the bloody F***!! "everyone" is not living my life, "society" is not facing the consequences of the "decision" that they took for me....Its my life, with no offense - it really is my life. Let me share something that moved me a few weeks ago...
I sat on a panel, interviewing some MBA grads from their campus. There sat this 24 year old guy, who said, I wanted to operate submarines - he wrote the navy exam and cleared it. But his parent's said navy is not a good career. He says "so I'm here. At this point after losing my navy opportunity, my job doesnt make a difference to me"...We asked him about submarines and his persona changed - he was passionate, his eyes glinted - obviously it meant a great deal to him....We dint offer him a job - we knew he could'nt sustain motivation in a 9-5 job. - A living example of Madhavan in 3 idiots!
- He might not have had a great career in navy - but if had done it and then realised it and made his own decision to quit, he would'nt be so disenchanted with life. For all you know, he might have been happier, making less money, just being able to feed his passion...We never know. I know one thing for sure - a good career, is not the same to everyone, a good life, a great partner - these are very individualistic tastes - nobody can define life for me or you. Each one our own.
So, in your life, let your decision be yours - think of "you" living with "your" decision versus "ëveryone's" decision every day for an extended period of your life...
more soon.
3 comments:
good 1 Sowmya... Always put I,ME,MYSELF ahead of others...You are not born here to please anyone...As u put it down Life cannot be defined...:)
Blany, first of all thanks for religiously following and commenting on every post - I'm honored.
Just to clarify, I am not advocating selfishness here - all I am saying is, if your tendency is to be individualist (I, me, myself) then you'll regret a collectivistic decision in your life - more will be clear, in my next post.
-WG
Eagerly waiting for the next one... Sowmya...I am taking a lot back from your blogs....D way I look @ lyf has changed...esp... Saying the magic word..."NO" is making me lot more confident....
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