Crisis.

I should sue Disney – for all the princess stories and their “good always prevails over bad” preaching animation movies and for disproportionately popularising the “happily everafter” concept. They’ve been selling lies to generations of children and no one’s gotten to them yet. I am afflicted. I cant stop hoping. I therefore sue Disney for damages of disillusionment that my life is becoming!

The pragmatic me says:

I’ve understood life is more of Tom and Jerry – each one does their own thing, no winners and losers, no good and bad, no beginning and no end – it is all a matter of time and context...

The idealist me says:

Yeah right, like hell, I am going to accept that....I am too sold on the Disney “ideals” – there is a karma and it always gets to you – in a good way or a bad way....truth (in the form of love or affection or righteousness or whatever be it) should essentially triumph.

Its an ongoing battle. But the idealist is losing hands down to the rationale and empirical evidence called life that the pragmatist lives. Denial seems like a route to take. But for how long?

Tell me really, is there a bloody point to this existence if you cant find what really anchors you to this life? What I have found so far are driftwoods that sail me a while...Is there a destination? Is there some point to this? – I dont know..All I know is that soul searching is an addictive form of escapism pushing you deeper and deeper in the search for the elusive and it definitely must be injurious to mental health!!!!

PS: I am NOT depressed. I am not going insane. In fact I am more stable than I have been in a long while. I’m just thinking my way out of mid-life crisis maybe!