Came to my blog after ages...read my old posts - and suddenly realised how much I've grown up in the past year and half - my writing seems so amateur to me - not in style but in content. Life's gone on. Things have changed in me outside me. Others have remained constant - and will remain for a few decades to come.....New settings, new activites, new people when I wrote my old post are now part of my everyday, my comfort zone. Life baffles me and scares me in its bizarre ability to flow by, noiselessly and so quickly for you to capture the frames coherently. When you are moving up, you dont look back and you hardly ever care about the missing frames...but then when life drops you down the precipice, you look back. Look back and ache for the memories you left behind, the frames that were left uncaptured....
The desperation of failure, unfulfilled dreams, pain of loneliness, the agony of separation, the unshed tears, the raging helplessness of what could have been, but cannot be - we hide it, and mask it in the mundaness of routine, the meaningless laughter, the pointless arguments and the much propagandised auto-suggestive, convincing definition of "good life". Everything works until, life brings the mirror of the past and you dont recognise the masked person anymore.....Then life makes you choose - to live with the mask and change yourself fundamentally or to tear it down and be what you are. The former is a easy on the world and the latter is easy on you - And as I see, talk, interact and understand more people including myself, I realise, most people find it convenient to live with a mask for the greater good of the universe.....Peace be with the world!!